Haha, a bit like me. Until the other day, I hadn't cleaned mine for a year. My wheels loked anthracite due to the dirt. My cup spoiler had bubbled and cracked paint all over it. My bonnet has a big rectangular shaped scratch mark where a roof tile blew off onto it. A few scratches here an there and car park dints down the side. Then I cleaned it the other day, it was looking good just from a wash, a thousand times better. I didn't polish or wax or anything 'coz really it needs another wash and claying first. But I took my cup spoiler back to the bodyshop who are re-doing it for free. I'll be taking it down for him to do the bonnet (£140) when I have a couple of days next week hopefully. Then get chipsaway/dentman on the go. Then I'll be looking for someone to PC it.
Moral of the story? Don't give a s**t for a while I guess, don't bother with it. Then you'll realise how much better it is when you look after it.