Hello, Carol? Its Alan. How are you? Me? Im having a fantastic time, yeah. Im having the best time since sliced bread. Hows Mr. Planet of the Apes man? Oh. Is he still driving that Renault CLIO? Yeah, can I just read you something from Top Gear magazine? No, its alright, Ive got it here, Ive got it here.With a mere ninety break-horse-power available, progress is too leisurely to be called fast, but on the motorway in fifth gear the CLIOS slow pace really becomes a pain. Uphill runs become power-sappingly mundane, while overtaking National Express coaches can become a long, drawn-out affair. Not my words, Carol. The words of Top Gear magazine.