Does it get any more French!!

[Yarp]

Ok, so this week I brought the Clio out of the garage for the first time in 3 years. Turns out it’s not in the same state as when it went in..

So it came out a bit lopsided

Hmm yeah ok there’s something not right there

Tyre looks a bit suspect too

Anyway, the list doesn’t stop there.

• The battery no longer holds charge because the alternator is drawing a voltage
• The front wiper squirt does the back window and front wiper blades and the back one does the front with the back wiper
• CV boot has split
• Both back springs have snapped
• Bonnet catch no longer works
• Stereo has gone missing
• Exhaust leaks from every joint

Aside from that, most my turbo bits turned up so now only need a downpipe and ph1 fuel setup then I’m good to go!

 

[hipwell]

Sounds like it went in a bit lopsided to me lol

That subframe mount looks a bit rotten, non of mine ever went bad there

 

[Yarp]

Yep, I now remember why I don’t buy french cars any more.

Mount is fine, looks worse in the pic than it is and cleaned up alright to be fair. Bottom arms are a different story but I’ll worry about them later 😂

 

[dann2707]

I now remember why I don’t buy french cars any more

Would have happened to any car tbh haha

Tyre wear looks very odd, do you know you're missing a strut bolt too?

 

[Yarp]

Would have happened to any car tbh haha

Tyre wear looks very odd, do you know you're missing a strut bolt too?

I’d taken the top one out before I got round to taking a pic 😂

 

[davo172]

Are you going to turbo it?
If so you think you have problems now!!? 🤣🤣

 

[Yarp]

Are you going to turbo it?
If so you think you have problems now!!? 🤣🤣

Yep. This turned up yesterday 😊

I’ll probably do it then forget about it to be fair. It’ll still probably be slower than me and the Mrs daily drivers anyway 😂.

 

[davo172]

Yep. This turned up yesterday 😊

I’ll probably do it then forget about it to be fair. It’ll still probably be slower than me and the Mrs daily drivers anyway 😂.

View attachment 1482401

You will never finish a turbo clio 🤣

 

[Yarp]

You will never finish a turbo clio 🤣

I bought the manifold and intercooler in 2018 haha! Taken this long to buy the rest.

The problem is I had a pretty well modified 335i so there was absolutely no point in doing the clio. Whatever I did it would never keep up when that was running just over 420bhp. I then swapped that for a 535 estate being a sensible dad. It’s mapped and still goes really well but it never lets you forget it weights the same as Westminster Abbey. Hence the need for something little and fun again

 

[jameswrx]

Is that turbo any good? Love the ‘turbocharger’ label screams China.

I’m gonna moan to you about the poor car though, owner blames car for being unreliable yet it’s lack of maintenance

 

[Iain C]

My mate had something similar with his m3.
Been stored in his garage 2 years. Went to clean it during lockdown to find the spring had snapped. Will sit there another few years now i expect.

 

[Yarp]

Is that turbo any good? Love the ‘turbocharger’ label screams China.

I’m gonna moan to you about the poor car though, owner blames car for being unreliable yet it’s lack of maintenance

How dare you question the authenticity of my turbo. It’s from the Czech Republic I’ll have you know 😂😂

It looks about the same size as one of the ones on the wife’s 5 series so I might just swap them when she’s not looking

 

[jameswrx]

How dare you question the authenticity of my turbo. It’s from the Czech Republic I’ll have you know 😂😂

It looks about the same size as one of the ones on the wife’s 5 series so I might just swap them when she’s not looking

You’re probably better off with that one than the 5 series one. Prob have some VNT tech that’ll be just about to play up.

 

[dann2707]

I bought the manifold and intercooler in 2018 haha! Taken this long to buy the rest.

The problem is I had a pretty well modified 335i so there was absolutely no point in doing the clio. Whatever I did it would never keep up when that was running just over 420bhp. I then swapped that for a 535 estate being a sensible dad. It’s mapped and still goes really well but it never lets you forget it weights the same as Westminster Abbey. Hence the need for something little and fun again

For what it's worth, I destroyed an m135i in my low boosted 182 a few days before heading for mapping. He caught me up at some traffic lights and was asking me what on earth I had under the bonnet 😂
Dont really do traffic light grand prix or willy waving like that but you'd be surprised as to how much the weight difference really makes the difference in these cars!

(well aware it was a 135i and yours was a 335i)

 

[Yarp]

For what it's worth, I destroyed an m135i in my low boosted 182 a few days before heading for mapping. He caught me up at some traffic lights and was asking me what on earth I had under the bonnet 😂
Dont really do traffic light grand prix or willy waving like that but you'd be surprised as to how much the weight difference really makes the difference in these cars!

(well aware it was a 135i and yours was a 335i)

I’d absolutely love to be proved wrong 😊

Depending on the year they both run the same engine so same power. The one I had was stage 3 map running bigger injectors, FMIC, catless downpipes, full exhaust system, uprated oil cooler and other boring things to keep you alive such as bigger brakes and suspension upgrades etc. Ran 422bhp and 712nm which was a to total waste of time until I stuck a LSD in. It managed a 11.9 1/4 mile with a bit of a tail wind 😂. If the Clio can come close to that I’ll be buzzing!

 

[dann2707]

I think you'll be pleasantly surprised!

 

[davo172]

For what it's worth, I destroyed an m135i in my low boosted 182 a few days before heading for mapping. He caught me up at some traffic lights and was asking me what on earth I had under the bonnet 😂
Dont really do traffic light grand prix or willy waving like that but you'd be surprised as to how much the weight difference really makes the difference in these cars!

(well aware it was a 135i and yours was a 335i)

When you say destroyed?
Over what speed and distance/speed?
As if the 135i driver can drive they are a VERY rapid car so can't see how you would massively out pace it in a 230ish clio.
I had a few runs at various speeds/times with Georges famous turbo clio on here years ago on way to a rolling road day where it made 230ish (it was supposed to be way more over 320 iirc )
He was pulling away but only very very slowly I was in my std mk6dsg golf gti (it made 228) on same rollers same day.

Also had a play with a few 135i 140i bms while I owned it they convincingly pulled away way from me once rolling they would be a lot quicker that a boosted 172.

 

[dann2707]

When you say destroyed?
Over what speed and distance/speed?
As if the 135i driver can drive they are a VERY rapid car so can't see how you would massively out pace it in a 230ish clio.
I had a few runs at various speeds/times with Georges famous turbo clio on here years ago on way to a rolling road day where it made 230ish (it was supposed to be way more over 320 iirc )
He was pulling away but only very very slowly I was in my std mk6dsg golf gti (it made 228) on same rollers same day.

Also had a play with a few 135i 140i bms while I owned it they convincingly pulled away way from me once rolling they would be a lot quicker that a boosted 172.

It was from a standstill up to 90mph (Mexico) ish, I'll be honest I was surprised I was in front too as I know my car wasn't even properly mapped too. He was also shocked hence him wanting to ask me what I had under the bonnet. Maybe his car wasn't running right? All I know is I was in front for the whole duration of it haha.

My car was fully stripped so had a significant weight advantage.

 

[dann2707]

To put it into perspective the 135i weighs 1560kg, mine weighed around 900kg.

It's not hard to understand how the clio was faster in this instance.

 

[Krarl]

It was from a standstill up to 90mph (Mexico) ish, I'll be honest I was surprised I was in front too as I know my car wasn't even properly mapped too. He was also shocked hence him wanting to ask me what I had under the bonnet. Maybe his car wasn't running right? All I know is I was in front for the whole duration of it haha.

My car was fully stripped so had a significant weight advantage.

A mate of mine destroyed an RS4 in his high boost Clio with 3 people in it 😂

The lad that had the RS4 is another mate of his and he sold it a week later having only had it for 3 weeks 😂 😂

 

[davo172]

To put it into perspective the 135i weighs 1560kg, mine weighed around 900kg.

It's not hard to understand how the clio was faster in this instance.

Not saying you were not quicker but when you say destroy suggests it wasnt even close if you got away first then up to 90 may not be able to close the gap.

May only be 10-20 bhp per ton difference and the bmw also has 450nm an auto most probably which makes it very rapid mid range.

Have you ever ran your car at drag strip to see what time of does?

 

[dann2707]

Not saying you were not quicker but when you say destroy suggests it wasnt even close if you got away first then up to 90 may not be able to close the gap.

May only be 10-20 bhp per ton difference and the bmw also has 450nm an auto most probably which makes it very rapid mid range.

Have you ever ran your car at drag strip to see what time of does?

I think you're hanging onto my original post a bit too much mate, I was simply stating that the op may be surprised that the two cars could/would be comparable and not a million miles away from each other rather than it being a 1.2 8v corsa vs lambo situation.

I never ran my car at a strip no, not in either guise of 230bhp or 285bhp. The piston rings went long before I could even think about doing anything like that haha