The messages so far;
Mate
I'm just wondering, the £40 delivery fee seems a little high.
Can we come to some sort of arrangement?
I'm only down in Bristol so you could be down and back in a day.
Kindest regards
A very happy bargain - hunter
Ollie
Dear 3mercer,
What part is it your after?
Cheers Adam
- foxadelphia384
Dear foxadelphia384,
Dont be a satchel.
I don't understand?
I bid on a car and won the auction, now youre aaking me what parts I want? All of them please. Although you can keep any rear view.mirror adornments. I just wanted to check that £40 was correct for delivery from West Yorks to Bristol.
It shouldn't take you long to drive it down if you came on a Saturday. Just make sure you have a watering can as I presume the radiator will need topping up every now and then.
I can't wait to get my new car. Always been a fan of the Williams.
Payment being sent shortly, I'm free this Saturday for delivery. I've booked in a track day at Llandlow on Sunday so need it before then really.
One quick question; how much tread do the tyres have left?
Can't wait to see you
Ollie
Adam,
Your lack of contact is not only annoying - but increasingly worrisome. I have eagerly awaited your reply on delivery date, to no end.
I have managed to sell, in advance, the wheels, exhaust, bootlid, bumper, parcel shelf and have many more serious bidders on the rear suspension and braking system. I had no idea one could make so much money from car parts! My wife is very happy with my investment, well, I say happy what I mean is she didn't slap in the balls in the car on the way home. I think we are finally bridging the emotional holes in our relationship - all thanks to my wily investments. So far ROI is running at a cool 1456.8% performing even better than my last venture - Baseless Greasy Buttplugs Inc.
You're putting my marriage in jeopardy now too.
I urgently need a delivery date. I have sold the car parts to some serious men, bad men.... CORNISH men. With every day that they don't receive their items, they will steal one of my wife's hanging baskets. Maybe I can get through this happening once "Charlotte, I'm really sorry I lost one of your baskets but I had to give it to an impoverished child for his sick grandmother". Once, that would work. Twice - come on, we live in Clifton. There are only one poor family here and my wife knows them personally - they own the chain of coffee shops we frequent on a weekend. Please, I beg you, only you can save my wifes beloved
allium senescens
Now, to more serious matters. I leave you no choice but to arrange delivery with me in 24 hours or else this listing will be reported. EBay doesn't look kindly on fee dodgers and I guarantee they will side with me.
Don't let me down.
Ollie
Dear foxadelphia384,
Adam
As I expected – the Corns came. Not only did they exact their threat of flora based vengeance they went further.
Picture the scene, if you will;
A happy 23 year old man wakes up to the sound of rustling in the front garden (no, they weren’t trying to steal my sheep). This in itself was not a great start to my day. I was having a rather pleasant dream involving a passionate encounter between Edwina Curry and the late, great, Benjamin Disraeli. Having exited a G8 conference (highly unrealistic, I know) the two accidentally barged into each other – words were exchanged, passionate looks, fleeting ‘accidental grazes’ culminating in a heated exchange with Disraeli bending Edwina over a Craps table muttering as he pumped her about Fiscal reform. She mentioning something about Former PM Major’s much smaller endowment. I digress….
Upon waking to the noise, and the now customary good morning slap to the gentleman vegetables from my wife, I witness what can only be described as three surprisingly dressed (trampily dressed by normal standards) Corns removing the aforementioned floral display from my front porch. One of them (the one with an extension cable as a belt and a hook for a hand) looked back at me in a most awful way shouting “Where’s my rear wiper blank?”.
So, as you can see the situation has now reached what I thought was its zenith. How wrong I was…..
Upon exiting the house (dressing gown on, cheeky bit of bollock on Display for Ms. Barlow next door) I find a nailed to my door written in Castrol GTX. I wont go into detail, it’s too harrowing, the upshot is next time theyre coming back with a rotavator to mulch my lawn. ITS ONLY JUNE! They obviously have no regard for cyclical garden care.
This will be the last message I send, I fear, by next time I will be elbow deep in ruined turf trying to salvage the front garden ahead of the Village Flower Show (4[SUP]th[/SUP] place last year).
I leave this in your hands.
Oliver