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Funniest Thing You Have Been Told By A Dealer...



  It's A Reno
Bear in mind that 'Renault' aren't 'Renault', they're a load of Franchised dealers. He's not going to point out to you that there's one 20 minutes up the road if it costs him or his group a sale! If the group don't have any country-wide, that's what he'll tell you.

I'd say it was more you that fits this thread than him, but hey!

Let him has his moan you miserable pedantic fcuker. Merry Xmas btw. :)
 
  Better than yours. C*nt.
I'm not miserable, just pointing out that he may not have been 'lying' or 'thick'!

Renault dealers are crap enough for us to moan about things that are actually wrong with them, without misunderstanding them and blaming them for it!
 
  Citreon Berlingo MPV
Yes car dealers normally deal with standard road cars, what did you expect them to say, "nice job mate, love your car"


On my service report for 36,000 miles it has recommended items that need replacing...

mine went something along the lines of:

Rear Bench - Not Present
Rear Seat - Not Present
Rear Seat Belt Anchor L - Not Present
Rear Seat Belt L - Not Present
Rear Seat Belt Anchor R - Not Present
Rear Seat Belt R - Not Present
Driver Airbag
Passenger Airbag

etc. etc...

Mr Hughes are you aware that your car is missing some of its vital components?

No I wasn't

Yes Mr Hughes, you are missing some vital safety equipment for passengers that you carry in the rear of the car...

I had to smile at this point...

:D

/y0z
 
  Better than yours. C*nt.
Yes car dealers normally deal with standard road cars, what did you expect them to say, "nice job mate, love your car"

Maybe put one and one together to get two, what with him having nothing backward of his front seats he may not actually ever take any rear passengers.

Maybe they'll do the same for the Vee?!
 
  It's A Reno
Maybe put one and one together to get two, what with him having nothing backward of his front seats he may not actually ever take any rear passengers.

Maybe they'll do the same for the Vee?!

Listen to yourself, relax, chill, exhale and take a sip from your alcoholic beverage.
Tinternet calling Mike. You sound like everyone's dad.
 
  Better than yours. C*nt.
Lol. Just bemused me how someone could defend the idiocy behind pointing out that a stripped out interior 'lacks safety features for passengers in the back'!

Nay mind. I'll carry on drinking and observing more important things.
 
  It's A Reno
Lol. Just bemused me how someone could defend the idiocy behind pointing out that a stripped out interior 'lacks safety features for passengers in the back'!

Nay mind. I'll carry on drinking and observing more important things.

Wow, you are drunk. Happy days. :)
 
  Citreon Berlingo MPV
No, vees are not designed to have rear seats, I love the way he thought it was really funny what the dealer said, so non standard, how cool, how amazing I have no back seats, great!!!!

Maybe put one and one together to get two, what with him having nothing backward of his front seats he may not actually ever take any rear passengers.

Maybe they'll do the same for the Vee?!
 
  Better than yours. C*nt.
No, vees are not designed to have rear seats, I love the way he thought it was really funny what the dealer said, so non standard, how cool, how amazing I have no back seats, great!!!!

So you'd not find it mildly amusing if Renault advised you needed to get a new manifold and a couple of hundred quids of inlet pipework 'because someone appears to have changed it and it's not the right part'?

Foo'.
 
  Citreon Berlingo MPV
you miss the point, he hadn't changed for different parts as you suggest, he had no parts

Foooooooooooooooo'.

So you'd not find it mildly amusing if Renault advised you needed to get a new manifold and a couple of hundred quids of inlet pipework 'because someone appears to have changed it and it's not the right part'?

Foo'.
 
  Better than yours. C*nt.
you miss the point, he hadn't changed for different parts as you suggest, he had no parts

Foooooooooooooooo'.

Exactly my point though!

"By the way, did you notice that someone had stolen 3/4 of your interior?"

"f**k, have they? Shiiiiit man, I only just put that back in!"

Just LOL at any logic defending the man!
 
  Citreon Berlingo MPV
I agree, true
Exactly my point though!

"By the way, did you notice that someone had stolen 3/4 of your interior?"

"f**k, have they? Shiiiiit man, I only just put that back in!"

Just LOL at any logic defending the man!
 
  Schma Schme 1.6l
funnist thing a dealer ever said to me....

"oh....that was ketamine....not coke.....have a good night".
 
  1.4 phase 1
funnist thing a dealer ever said to me....

"oh....that was ketamine....not coke.....have a good night".

looool

dealer:its white widow
me: you sure it looks like purple haze
dealer:yea white widow
me:well its purple
dealer:purple haze anit really purple
me:it is in amsterdam
 
  Clio 200
Bear in mind that 'Renault' aren't 'Renault', they're a load of Franchised dealers. He's not going to point out to you that there's one 20 minutes up the road if it costs him or his group a sale! If the group don't have any country-wide, that's what he'll tell you.

I'd say it was more you that fits this thread than him, but hey!

both are arnold clarks, both can check each others stock and would have been able to get the car down to his branch.

might want to reserve judgement in future so you dont look like a complete tool again
 
  Mk2 Ph2 Clio II 1.6 16v
Here in Venezuela we only get 5 door Clios, they told me the rear doors only came with manual windows just in case you fall in a lake you could get out of the car...

WTF?
 
  Goliath I
When I bought my 182 cup I was trading in my old clio.

I had been passed onto another guy in the dealers and was asked what reg it was, I said 54, the other guy came back asked his colleague 'what is it' to which the guy replied 'five four'

They didn't even look at the car which had a warped bonnet, scuffed near side wing, the indicators didn't work (hazard lihgts had jammed) I pretty much wrecked it.

They gave me 5,400 trade in :) Lets just say when the keys got handed over they went nuts!
 
remember gas shocks are only gas preasurised they still have oil in them and can still leak.....
To be fair this was my c**k up, I later posted a retraction pg 136 0f this thread, this is the 2nd time somone has picked up on this mistake in this thread, my bad:eek:.
 

DB.

  BMW 440i
When looking for my 182, i was told that the cup packs had no affect on the resale value, and that i was wasting my time looking for a Racing Blue 182, i should simply buy there 04 plate 182 with no cup packs for £8495

(This was about 3 months ago)

I only went into the dealer as it is on the road of my student accomodation, i went in with my racing blue 182 to buy some Renaultsport car mats the week after and the woman said i must be very lucky to have found one in this colour. Pffft
 
  Iceberg Ph1
Non Renault related but still a dealer funny in my eyes,

I crashed my car a FEW years back (rather upsetting but a different story) and needed a quick run around for a while so I got myself a nice 04 plate Fiat Punto, nothing flash but it was actually a good car.. Anyways was told I could pick it up in a few days after they valeted it and what not, so goes to pick it up and was heading up to Bedford straight from the garage. Hopped in and pulled away and instantly the car broke down :rolleyes: As some of you may know the Punto came with 'City Steering' and it went t!ts up and something broke and the entire power steering stopped working.. I strolled back into the dealers and said (calmly) the car had broken down with in 2 feet of driving away, to a reply I got saying, ''Yeah, we can book it in in a few days''.. A little stumped I said that I literally just brought the car and picked it up 5mins ago, well 10 mins later out comes the head technician/manager, walked outside and took my car, pushed with some help into the garage and was told to wait inside. 1 hour later out he comes, fixed, some sensor had gone up the wall, happy enough I go to thank him and ask for the keys, to which he sits down taps away and its PC and confronts me with a bill for nearly £200!? WTF! I actually thought this was a joke, which turned out not to be.. Needless to say it all ended with me not paying a penny (too rightly also) a free MOT and Service...

More a rant then a funny, but the humorous part to this story was the dealers trying to tell me I owed them money for a repair on a car I owned for less then 5 minutes.. Fiat.. Not again tbh!
 

Gally

Formerly Mashed up egg in a cup
ClioSport Club Member
"That'll be £200 please sir"

Flol

Flol

Flol

I'd have walked out with the keys in my hand.
 
  Iceberg Ph1
"That'll be £200 please sir"

Flol

Flol

Flol

I'd have walked out with the keys in my hand.

That was the plan, thinking that was what was going to happen, apart from he put the keys in his pocket and then served me with a bill! :clown:
 
  Iceberg Ph1
Haha yeah.. I was gob smacked as you could imagine! I seriously didn't know what to do for about 5 mins, I just stood there with my jaw swinging.. absolutely shocking service!
 
  330ci sport
Calling my local Renault Dealer Parts dept. to check if they had a centre exhaust mount in stock.

Got the feeling the fella couldn't arsed when he said a few people had phoned up recently for exhaust mounts. He had apparently advised them, as he advised me, 'to call Kwikfit up the road cos they stock all sorts'. lol.
 
  STEALTH RAIDER
Just ordered a 200 with various options which is due in any day now. Got a call this morning

Dealer "you car hasnt arrived yet sir due to weather problems"
Me "ok no problem, when do you think it will arrive?"
Dealer "we dont know but any day now"
Me "just call me then when it arrives"
Dealer "certainly will. In the meantime, would you mind comming in today and signing the higher purchase agreement and bring with you some proof of identity"
Me "you mean you want me to sign the agreement before its even arrived? what if there are problems? i would like to make sure everthing is ok, check the paint and the spec is correct"
Dealer "i can guarantee that nothing will be wrong with the car and also you will be able to pick the car up quicker without waiting too long"
Me "but what if something is wrong?"
Dealer "then we can have a conversation if that arises"
Me (trying not to laugh) "would you buy a house without looking at it?"
Dealer "as a matter of fact i have but i guess this isnt the right time to talk about it"
Me (actually laughing) "i dont want to sign the docs until i have inspected the car when it arrives"
NOW IN AN ARGUEMENT
Dealer "ill have to call my manager because he is in London today, i dont think you can do that"
Me "have you not been in sales long?"
Dealer "for 3 years and 4 years in other dealerships"
Me "you better call your manager now then before i ask for my deposit back"
Dealer "you know you will loose the deposit as you ordered that vehicle and its classed as refusing goods"
Me "how can i refuse the goods if its not even here yet?"
Dealer "i will call you back in a minute after ive spoke to my manager" (then puts the phone down on me)
ME THEN WALKING AROUND IN CIRCLES THINKING CHEEKY FCUKER!!!:mad:
10 MINS LATER.............
Dealer "hi there, ive spoke to my manager and he says its fine that you want to see the vehicle first. I guess it gives you that extra peace of mind"
Me "i could of saved you a phone call. Byther way, why did you rudely put the phone down on me?"
Dealer "my manager came into the office"
Me :S "thought he was in London? "
Dealer :eek: "errrrm......(very long pause) he forgot his car keys"
Me "ok, ill be awaiting your call"
Dealer "no problem, see you later on today"
Me "what for?"
Dealer (another long pause) "oh nevermind, i forgot what i was going to say"
Me (now pizzing my pants) "call me then when you remember"

FLOL!!!!!!! DUMB PERSON WHO HAS BEEN IN SALES FOR 7 YEARS FTW!!! :D
 
  STEALTH RAIDER
^^^^As mentioned in other threads, i got a family member discount on the 200 before he left so i got the 200 with £1500 of extras for £13,588 (after a £500 deposit) and 0% interest over 3 years. 0% can be offered to other customers but the car would be at list price, so he told me. Not a bad saving if you ask me. Was gonna keep my fiesta st500 but had to many issues with it. This tempted me even more so i hope ive made the right choice :D Lew
 
  Ph 1 172
Not sure how funny it is but i recently went in to my local dealer and asked this simple question
(me)excuse me mate i need the rear badges that say Renault, clio and sport plus the 2.0 16v side bullets.
(dealer) then went to get the pieces when he had all of them, he totaled them all up and then asked for £115.29 i actually pissed my pants and then he said that does not include VAT and asked how i would like to pay for these lol....
I then laughed in the poor guys face an asked why are these so much?
to which he replied and i quote- well these rarely get changed unless your in a crash or "dicking" around with them so renault charge more lol
 

Addz

ClioSport Club Member
  Trophy, TVR Tamora
not renault but a carspares i work at...

got a phone call earlier from some young lad

"hi mate, i need a price on a battery please"

"yep no problem, what car is it?"

"its a rover 25 1.4 16v... only i've got it to the same power as a 2.0 so i need a more powerfull battery for it"

*giggles for a mo*

"right well a standard battery will be fine on that, £34.99 inc vat"

"oh are you sure?"

"yep definatly"

:clown:
 
  clio 182
My alternator went so I went into Renault for a part number and quote I was told I would not have change from £500 as the alternator is in a tight space and since their mechanic is a bodybuilder it is difficult for him to do since he has large hands so takes him longer and he doesn't like doing them.I walked out and got it replaced parts included for just under £200 (special price).:rasp:
 


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