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Funniest Thing You Have Been Told By A Dealer...



  Saxo VTS
Lol some classics here.

Erm not really a funny story but it did piss me off something chronic.

Me: "Hi, I ordered this part a few weeks ago but when the garage came to fit it they say it's wrong. I'd like a refund please"
Dickhead1: "Ok, I'll go and see what I can do"
*10 minutes spent admiring the filthy reception lady and Dickhead1 returns*
Dickhead1: "Hi, I'm afraid we can't refund this part as it was special order"
Me: "Ok,well then, you 'Special ordered' the wrong part"
Dickhead1: "Yes well we agreed on the phone that this was the correct part"
Me: "No, I agreed on the phone that I was ordering a lower cambelt ccover for a Clio 16v F7P-710 engine"
Dickhead1: "Yes but also you picked this partup 6 weeks ago so we can't fo anything"
Me: "I thought because YOU special ordered the wrong part that is was non-returnable anyway..."
Dickhead "Well, er yess er.."
Me: "And what does 6 weeks or 6 months matter, it's still wrong"

At this point, as he was starting to crumble, Dickhead2 arrives and feeds me some crap about how we had agreed on the part. Ffs I agreed on the correct parts you t**t, no some cambelt cover for a Kangoo or some crap.

So in the end I say;

Me: "So basicaly I have a £27 piece of plastic to put on my mantlepiece?"
Dickhead1: "Well yes"
Me: "Ok, bye"

Fecking idiots.

That's AJ Blackler in Newton Abbot for y'al to know. Usualy not too bad but I always have to give them my REG and they still don't know what an F7P is.
 
  Clio 1.6 16v Dynamique +
This was more annoying than funny. When the ph2 Renault 19 came out, we went to Wilsons in Epsom to see if we could get a test drive. The salesman informed us we could not have a test drive unless we promised to buy it. When we said we wanted to see what it was like to drive before we commited ourselves, he told us he could not allow us to do it. So, Hubby went a bought a Pug 306 instead. w*****s!
 
  clio 172 cup
just after i ordered my 172 cup i went to the yorkshire show and was told a new clio sport was coming out called the playstation, so i went to my dealer and he told me that there was definatley no new sport coming out for at least a year then 3 months after i picked my car up the 182 came out!!!
 
  Clio 1.6 16v Dynamique +
rob172cup said:
just after i ordered my 172 cup i went to the yorkshire show and was told a new clio sport was coming out called the playstation, so i went to my dealer and he told me that there was definatley no new sport coming out for at least a year then 3 months after i picked my car up the 182 came out!!!


Total w*****s! I guess they didn't want you to wait they wanted a sale NOW. Really pisses you off doesn't it? Grrrrr
 
  80MPG BEEZA
FincH said:
Lol some classics here.

Erm not really a funny story but it did piss me off something chronic.

Me: "Hi, I ordered this part a few weeks ago but when the garage came to fit it they say it's wrong. I'd like a refund please"
Dickhead1: "Ok, I'll go and see what I can do"
*10 minutes spent admiring the filthy reception lady and Dickhead1 returns*
Dickhead1: "Hi, I'm afraid we can't refund this part as it was special order"
Me: "Ok,well then, you 'Special ordered' the wrong part"
Dickhead1: "Yes well we agreed on the phone that this was the correct part"
Me: "No, I agreed on the phone that I was ordering a lower cambelt ccover for a Clio 16v F7P-710 engine"
Dickhead1: "Yes but also you picked this partup 6 weeks ago so we can't fo anything"
Me: "I thought because YOU special ordered the wrong part that is was non-returnable anyway..."
Dickhead "Well, er yess er.."
Me: "And what does 6 weeks or 6 months matter, it's still wrong"

At this point, as he was starting to crumble, Dickhead2 arrives and feeds me some crap about how we had agreed on the part. Ffs I agreed on the correct parts you tw*t, no some cambelt cover for a Kangoo or some crap.

So in the end I say;

Me: "So basicaly I have a £27 piece of plastic to put on my mantlepiece?"
Dickhead1: "Well yes"
Me: "Ok, bye"

Fecking idiots.

That's AJ Blackler in Newton Abbot for y'al to know. Usualy not too bad but I always have to give them my REG and they still don't know what an F7P is.

the exact same happened to my mate at work with his clio he ordered a mount told them directly which one he needed and for what model gets it goes home to change it and its the wrong one takes it back and they say we cant refund it as its special order so he used it to scratch a car on the way out
 
  Clio 1.6 16v Dynamique +
Batman said:
the exact same happened to my mate at work with his clio he ordered a mount told them directly which one he needed and for what model gets it goes home to change it and its the wrong one takes it back and they say we cant refund it as its special order so he used it to scratch a car on the way out


It does not matter if it is a special order. If you have told them what car it is for and what part you need, it is down to them to order the correct part. I had a similar problem and the dealer refused to take the parts back. I got onto the Officer Of Fair Trading, he told me that it was the dealers fault for ordering the wrong part and that the part was not correct for the purpose required, therefore they had to take it back and give me a full refund. I went back to dealer , told them what this guy had said and they did indeed give me a full refund. Don't let these arseholes get away with these things. They are dealers, they should know what they are doing. f**king t***s!
 
  clio 172 cup
DynamiqueDebz said:
Total w*nkers! I guess they didn't want you to wait they wanted a sale NOW. Really pisses you off doesn't it? Grrrrr


no it didnt really as i really wanted a cup if it had been the throphy then i would have been.
 
  Clio 1.6 16v Dynamique +
rob172cup said:
no it didnt really as i really wanted a cup if it had been the throphy then i would have been.

Fair enough. At least you got what you wanted. ;) They still should have known though, bloody idiots!
 
  80MPG BEEZA
DynamiqueDebz said:
It does not matter if it is a special order. If you have told them what car it is for and what part you need, it is down to them to order the correct part. I had a similar problem and the dealer refused to take the parts back. I got onto the Officer Of Fair Trading, he told me that it was the dealers fault for ordering the wrong part and that the part was not correct for the purpose required, therefore they had to take it back and give me a full refund. I went back to dealer , told them what this guy had said and they did indeed give me a full refund. Don't let these arseholes get away with these things. They are dealers, they should know what they are doing. f**king tw*ts!

cheers i'll tell my mate tonight and see if he still has it to take it back! thank god they gave me the right mounts when i ordered them :)
 

Martin_172

ClioSport Club Member
me: hi id like to order this part (hand piece of paper over with part number on it)
partsguy *playing on his computer*:what is it anyway
me: a clio 172 gearbox mount
partsguy:what age are you
me: 17 *with a confused look on my face*
partsguy: you sure its a 172 you have
me:no its a 1.2
partsguy:well this isnt the part number you need
me:yes it is its a stronger version, fits my car and i can use uprated bushes on it
partsguy:i dont think so the clio sport is a totally different car
me:just order the thing for me please
 
Some of theses posts are hilarious!! Others down right scary!

I can honestly say I have never had any problems ordering parts from my local Renualt dealer. Give the parts guy the part number or if I don't have it tell him what the part is, he looks it up on his computer gives me a price always with discount and it arrives the next day. The dealer is Wests Renault, Clapham, Bedford, the parts guy is Gary. Couldn't be a more helpful chap!
 
  Racin Blue 182
me 'hello, I'd like to book my car in for a service please'.
dealer 'what's the engine size?'
me '2.0l'
dealer 'must be a Laguna then?'
me 'no, it's a Clio'
dealer (clearly thinking Im joking/wrong) 'are you sure?'
me 'yes, it's a 182' (knowing when I say this he'll still have no clue.....)
dealer 'oh, ok..... which service is it, 18000?'
me 'no, it's 12000'
dealer 'doesn't need one until 18000/two years'
me 'the renaultsport models need a service every 12000miles'
dealer 'ok, we can do it next Thursday'
me 'that's fine for me, what oil do you put in?'
dealer 'err, well.... it's 10w 40, why?'
me 'coz it should be 5w 40 on the 182'
dealer 'really? well we'll put that in then'
me 'can I supply my own oil and reduce the service cost?'
dealer 'why do you want to supply your own oil?'
me 'Because I can get it cheaper' (bit of a fib there)
dealer 'oh, ok'

This was my experience of the Renault Service desk at my local dealer, what a joke.... thing is, even though I provided my own oil, I don't know if they used it, and better still, they gave me another litre of 10w40 for top ups!!!! lol
 
  Saab 93 Aero Wagon
A very good mate of mine is a salesman at my local Renault dealer so i know most of the guys there and they all seem to know their stuff so i don't have any foolish conversations to put here but here is a recent convo with the Senior Salesman who i know who has the 197 as his demo.

Me: "Hey mate, how you finding the 197 now thats its run in?"

SS: "Yeah, its still pretty low on get-go low down but i've had a bit of a drag against a Trophy coming out of Silverstone a few weeks back and it kept up, so its pretty much as quick. Also had a CTR recently...Handling is spot on. Still suffers from the cold start roughness like the old one though...etc etc. When you gonna have a test drive?"

ME: When the Cup arrives!

My mate then comes over and says "Yeah he has had the 197 up against the usual competition and its held its own......did he tell what DID own him the other day tho??"
I shrugged.
"A Mercedes Sprinter!"

Go figure!
 
Just a few of niggly things with my local dealer, Reg Vardy @ Stonygate, sunderland

1st was i needed a back box and they said that they couldnt do one till monday, (it was on a friday) and it would be 110 quid, i asked if i could pick it up from their warehouse, said ok there in stock and they are 100 quid, and its closer to my house than the dealers!! they wanted a tenner to deliver it to them and i would have still had to pick the thing up

2nd was for a service book which i lost, contacted reno uk and asked if they could send me one, they said they were free and i can pick one up at the dealers, called them up and asked if they had any in, - yes at 10 quid, explained that they are free and he said i was lying, called reno uk back and told them this with the garage name aswell - they sent me one in the post free of charge!

3rd was i needed a climate controll sensor as it was making a buzzing noise, went to the parts dept, asked for one, what car etc... 172 etc..

him "that hasnt got climate controll"
me "it has"
Him "are you sure"
me "ill show you"
took him to my car and showed him the climate control panel, i started to pull the interior light down he asked why, i said to get the part number - no need, i know exactly what it is now.
went back into the parts dept, he went into the back was there 15 minutes and came out empty handed, we dont have that part in stock, but have you got the part number? so i had to go to my car again to get the chasis number cos my reg doesnt apperar on the system for some reason.

then he put it into the computer to check for stock - WTF was he doing in the back for 15 minutes?
T0ssers
 
  Not a Clio anymore.....
I knew my exhaust was making a racket and I knew where from. Following a service I was told that I needed a whole new manifold and down pipe, whihc would have to be special ordered for an extra £50 on top of the £480 parts and labour to fit it. Puzzled I took my car away, got an independent garage to have a look, 10 mins later the fault diagnosed as a £25 exhaust gasket. They changed it, now sounding good as new.

Back to renault. Made them photocopy all documents, service reports etc they had given me so I had copies and then dumped the old gasket on the counter asking the monkey what he thought it was. He said some sort of exhaust part. I proceded to explain to him that was the fault they had diagnosed as costing nearly £500 clearly shown in the hand written service report which cost me less than 10% of that to fix. All he could say was thats what the computer system monitoring my car service said so thats what was wrong. So what exactly do you pay your mechanics to do? I asked. All you are doing is ripping me off for work that does not need to be done and charging me for time that a mechanic didn't even spend looking at my car!! He then said the clincher 'Why would we want to charge you for work that doesn't need doing? Duh, I don't know to make even more money?!!! After versing him on the economics of running a garage with him backing further away from me each second I was then asked to leave as I was disturbing the other customers. So I did and never been back to a dealer since.
 
  R26
The best thread I've read in a while! Not had any probs with my local dealer - DARLINGTONS, HARLOW - apart from them not letting me test drive a 197 as they thought I couldn't handle the power. This is when I pointed out my 172 in the car park..... I'll be going back when the 197Cup is out.
 
  172 Cup 2003
me: can i have 172 front grille please?

ren: that'll be £200

me:no it wont there's a problem with your computer it brings up the wrong
price!
ren:NO there's not, we are 100% the price is £200.

me:can you please check the master stock file they'll see its' not.

ren: Ok but i know i'm right!

(FEW MINS LATER AND LOOKING STUPID)

ren:eek:k sir that'l be £47 inc. tax

me: chucking away.. i haven't got any change here's £40

ren:Ok sir..sorry about that mix up he looked very red
 
  Clio 1.2 Expression
When buying my 1.2 Expression, i was told it was a 1.2 Dynamique Expression. I assumed he wasn't stupid and was just trying to sell the car but reading about some of the stupid dealers on here he probably was thick as pig s**t
 
My mum went looking at a new Yaris a couple of years ago, and my bro was with her, so he asked the salesman,
bro "What's the 0-60"
salesman "Well, depends how hard you accelerate, normally about 10s, but if you really give it some, probably about 7s"
bro *stunned silence*
 
  Golf MK7,GSX-R600 L4
I was looking at a mini cooper s
salesman ' Nice car isnt it '
me ' Its alright but its slower than my cup, thats the only problem'
saleman ' Oh, you have the dynamique with a 2.0 engine in '

cheeky b*astard 'no offence to the dynamique but i would hope more engineering went into the cup than just sticking a 2.0 lump in!
 
crazycup said:
I was looking at a mini cooper s
salesman ' Nice car isnt it '
me ' Its alright but its slower than my cup, thats the only problem'
saleman ' Oh, you have the dynamique with a 2.0 engine in '

cheeky b*astard 'no offence to the dynamique but i would hope more engineering went into the cup than just sticking a 2.0 lump in!
He was being cheeky mate.. ;)
 
Me:
I'm looking to get a price on a v6 spoiler... the one off a Clio Trophy?

Parts guy:
Clio? Trophy? I don't know what that is.

:eek:
 
crazycup said:
cheeky b*astard 'no offence to the dynamique but i would hope more engineering went into the cup than just sticking a 2.0 lump in!
I've got bad news for you then.

All the Clios use the same body shell 172/182's just have differetn front end stuff body panel are a bit different and rear axle.
 

MCG

  Vauxhall Astra VXR
My hand brake warning light kept coming on on my 182, still within warranty. I knew it was the front brake pads but just wanted them to confirm it because sometimes they'll replace them under the warranty since I've only had it 6 months. Booked it in, they took it in the next week, said to come back in 4 hours. Got a phone call 3 hours later "we can't find the wheel nuts to take the wheels off to look at the car". All 182's have a compartment in the boot with them in!!! They confirmed even though they cant get the wheels off, it was the front break pads. Then they said they'll replace them for £130. Do I want to go ahead? I said no, brake pads are only £30. He said "you need them done now or it will be dangerous". Ended up getting it done elsewhere. They had the car 4 hours and they never even done anything with it.

Also, when I was enquiring about a trophy, the sales guy said the sound system was exactly the same as my 182FF which is isn't, he said the only difference was it is lighter and the interior is different. I said "so if those are the only differences, why should I buy it?". I expected him to go into the whole suspension thing. But his reply was "well its limited edition". He also said there wasn't enough petrol in it to take it for a test drive. When I said I'd have to be stupid to buy a car without driving it first, there was suddenly petrol in it. He also said because he was giving me £8000 for my 2005 182, he would have to increase the price of the trophy by another £2000??? Ended up not buying it as he was trying to rip me off and I prefer FF's anyway.
 
  172 cup
Me: im after some filters for my 306 rallye mate, heres the reg number.....
Parts guy: er, computer says its a gti-6
Me: well its a limited edition version of the gti-6, stripped out and that you see but basically the same car
Parts guy: so you mean youve bought a gti-6 and stripped it out to go rallying in it??
Me: This is a peugeot garage isnt it?????
 
  Golf MK7,GSX-R600 L4
edde said:
I've got bad news for you then.

All the Clios use the same body shell 172/182's just have differetn front end stuff body panel are a bit different and rear axle.

what about the suspension, track, brakes etc???
 
crazycup said:
what about the suspension, track, brakes etc???
Body sheel is the same the brakes and suspension ins't that much though its not like the Williams where the body sheel was different.
 
  Disco 5 ,Monaro VXR
mine was that i had replaced all brake pads two days before i got my car serviced and when the service sheet came back it said that my brake pads where 70% worn??? so i asked to see the manager and he can out of his office and i then told him i would like to have the service sheet changed and showed him the reciept for my new pads and also 4 the pads being fitted.

and he then told me that he wasnt prepared to change it as he "wasnt qualified to do so"

and then told me well all you kids are the same and drive like "idiots" anyway to which i replyed that my dad would be ringing back later to cancel the 5 company cars he had ordered the day before

and he then must have clocked the surname and was almost on his hands and knees. it was class

its great when you get one over on them as being 23 they just think they can speak to you as if you dont matter.
 
  Black 200 Cup
'Your brake pads AND Discs need changing' (same pads and discs 3000 miles later)
'Your rear brake balance adjuster has somehow been torn off and we can't even find the mounting points for it, it's £blah, do you want us to go ahead and order one?'

I was assured that the mechanics were RenaultSport specialists when I bought my Cup ha!...every time I go into the dealers I still have to explain my car. It's irritating and boring now. While my local dealers are by no means total cowboys, they're borderline incompetent and it just doesn't inspire confidence. And they don't care.

Today I'm going in for clunky driver's side suspension on full lock, melty steering wheel, a whole new passenger side wing mirror (£151 fitted) and (ouch) a new Speedline Turini which I wrecked last night hitting something fairly substantial on the motorway. So we'll see how that lot goes...hopefully the first two will get fixed under warranty -2 months left- fingers crossed and all that, eh?
 
  Better than yours. C*nt.
lol have to agree, we do have some stupid salesmen at our place!, but u do get alot of customers who talk s**t lol

actually had 1 lad the other week who owned a mk2 ph2 1.2 clio, saying to me if he fits this resistor to his alternator he will gain 20bhp lol along with his spitfire plugs

You won't get many spitfire plugs in a Clio. You'll still have 8 of them left over!
 
  1.2 16v Dynamique.
again not particular funny but i towed mine to a dealer to 1st of all try a key recode as the immobiliser refused to come off. when i called later on in the day i got through to the workshop. mechanic 'were you wanting to collect your car this afternoon mr browning?' 'oh great' i replied 'its fixed then' 'er, 'no we havent looked at it yet' 'eh!, well why would i want to collect it if its not ready?' 'dont know' was his reply!
cheeky b*stard takin the p*ss or what? what planet are they on?
 
  Better than yours. C*nt.
My old Smart had a problem with wing mirrors, and a week after Smart of Derby had replaced it it was falling off again. I took it back to them where they took it into the workshop for a half hour, battered the hell out of it (really shouldn't put glass in if that's what they're gonna do) and then parked it outside, to come in and tell me it's supposed to be like that.
 
  clio 1.6 16v 2001 (Y reg)
"youre getting a realy good deal sir!"


"we are very trust worthy" (as my motor was getting repaired)
that was enough for me, i hit the floor rolling with laughter!!

"you'll have to take it benfield renault as we dont know what is wrong with it"
same repair as the last!

these are only a few things i've been told from reg vardy's.

bunch of f**king :clown:
 
  NEED V6!
i took mine in cuz my car felt all wrong and making noises,they checked it over and said its in perfect condition,i returned next day at 9am with engine failure and needed new engine

muppets
 
  clio 172 cup
had 24k service on my 172 cup and was told that i needed new rear discs and pads at a cost of £295+vat! checked with a local specialist and got the same but named brand for £150inc vat and fitting!
 
  911 carrera 2, Yamaha R6
Not a dealer but when I called the AA out for a flat battery on my 172, the guy told me my auto headlights must have come on while the car was parked in the garage because it was so dark in there!?
There must be 000's of clio's just flashing there lights at night
He told me battery was dead needed a new one just 'happend' to have one @ £70.
I charged it up with an old charger - been fine for the last 2 months - good old AA
 


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