[PC/XB360/PS3] The Elder Scrolls V : Skyrim

[Scutch]

£10 if you buy it with the copy of the game. At Game.

Game.

PMSL. All I need to do now is visit a doctor who can send me back 3000 years.

 

[AK]

IRL?

 

[Scutch]

IRL?

Yeah.

Karl Pilkington : Its not a good time to be blind.
Ricky Gervais : Brilliant...
Karl Pilkingon : So I'd prefer, if I was going to be blind, be blind back when Tooten Ka-Moon was knocking about.
Ricky Gervais : Do you think thats a choice that people have, that are blind now?
"If you're gonna be blind, be blind back when Tutenkamoon was knocking about."
"Sorry Doctor, I didnt realise there was a choice."
"Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah if you'd have only told me you were going blind I'd have said 'let's get you back 3000 years.'"

 

[Scutch]

Also, I haven't encountered a troll yet, but came up against a load of Mage's on the "Night to Remember" quest. Ouch.

 

[Cookie]

Yeah.

Karl Pilkington : Its not a good time to be blind.
Ricky Gervais : Brilliant...
Karl Pilkingon : So I'd prefer, if I was going to be blind, be blind back when Tooten Ka-Moon was knocking about.
Ricky Gervais : Do you think thats a choice that people have, that are blind now?
"If you're gonna be blind, be blind back when Tutenkamoon was knocking about."
"Sorry Doctor, I didnt realise there was a choice."
"Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah if you'd have only told me you were going blind I'd have said 'let's get you back 3000 years.'"

LOL I listened to that the other day. Brilliant

 

[Christopher]

'Let's get you back 3000 years then.'

LOL.

Also; 'oh Maud, you dopey f*cking slut...'

 

[Cookie]

'Let's get you back 3000 years then.'

LOL.

Also; 'oh Maud, you dopey f*cking slut...'

Was crying at that. Probably the first time anyone called Maud has been referred to as a slut

 

[Scutch]

Was crying at that. Probably the first time anyone called Maud has been referred to as a slut

Same here. I genuinely came close to falling out of the bed trying not to laugh so hard and wake the missus.

"Stay out of my f*cking kitchen!"

 

[Scutch]

Oh, and back to the game, what's the point of spending coins on house furnishings?

 

[Christopher]

That and Ricky introducing him on one of the later 'Guide To' podcasts had me doubled over.

'...and Karl Pilkington; f*cking mong'

 

[Christopher]

Oh, and back to the game, what's the point of spending coins on house furnishings?

You get somewhere to stash all your stolen sh*t. And your own alchemy lab/enchanting area.

And you wife lives there and cooks for you.

 

[Scutch]

That and Ricky introducing him on one of the later 'Guide To' podcasts had me doubled over.

'...and Karl Pilkington; f*cking mong'

The one where he says about Karl licking windows, f*cking gump had my laughing. Karl even says, "Bit harsh, wasn't it?" PMSL.

 

[Munson]

You know you're addicted when you rage that someone set your horse on fire, and continue to dice their corpse into little cubes long after you've killed them.

TBF the horse took it pretty well once the flames had gone out, but he was a bit roided up about it initially.

Are there any premium horses?

 

[Craigus]

My house is fully furnished. It looks nice.

I lol'd at the wife thing, I did it for the achievement, went to the ceremony said I do, and everyone got up and left. I then went and spoke to my wife told her we were living in Whiterun, so she said "I'll see you there". Went home, and she was cooking. The only two dialogue options were:

"We are going to live somewhere else"
and
"Can you cook me something to eat"

LOL

 

[Scutch]

You know you're addicted when you rage that someone set your horse on fire, and continue to dice their corpse into little cubes long after you've killed them.

TBF the horse took it pretty well once the flames had gone out, but he was a bit roided up about it initially.

Are there any premium horses?

Isn't there a bucket of water spell? Red Rum is mental when he's roided up. I've had a few run ins with them.

 

[Munson]

How do I get a house and a wife? No need for RL once that's done.

 

[Craigus]

I was fighting a Dragon on Eldersblood Peak, and frost troll started on me too, "Great" I thought.

Then the frost troll and the dragon decided they weren't interested in me anymore, and set about killing each other, so I just sat back and watched. The frost troll won! Then I had to f**k him up, which was not easy.

Also

Spoiler

anyone done the quest for some bloke in Solitude who asks you to go and get his master back from these halls in Blue Palace? Turns out you go in there and you end up in the mind of a mental dead king, and you had to escape. I had to load an old save as I couldn't get out, was proper trippy.

 

[Craigus]

How do I get a house and a wife? No need for RL once that's done.

You need to get the Amulet of Mara. You can buy it off the priest in Riften. Then you wear it, and there are certain birds that you can marry, you have to have done a quest for them though. One of them is in the Riverwood trader, you have to get the claw for her which is the first real mission. Also some bird in Whiterun who you have to find a Mamoth tusk for.

 

[Scutch]

Also when the game is patched soon, you'll be able to marry Lydia.

 

[Snakey]

Archers skill shot...

I lol'd

 

[Munson]

Also when the game is patched soon, you'll be able to marry Lydia.

With no lag? Lydia got killed in my game ages ago. She's not my type. There's a fit blonde that works in the pub though.

 

[Cookie]

If I married Lydia now I'd probably be arrested

I found my other companion bloke, sat in a pub by himself. Need to go fetch him again and use him as a packhorse

 

[Christopher]

I bought the house in Solitude yesterday. 25,000 Gold for the house and another 12,000 Gold to furnish it.

Gotta love being a master thief. Never been caught once either.

 

[Craigus]

There are some bits that make me LOL in this game.

I went into a pub, some bloke turns around and says "what are you looking at?" So I gave it the macho and tried intimidating him, which didn't work and got into a fight with him, him wearing some old robes and no shoes, with me looking like this:

So I beat him to a pulp, he gets up and says, "You've been a good friend to me, that means something". Really, I have just beaten the s**t out of you. Next time I saw him was at my wedding! Lol

 

[Scutch]

Had an epic battle with a dragon yesterday. I'd just ran from a wizards house (who proved to be too hard to kill - he kept regenerating health when it became too low. Perhaps now in hindsight I should have used the shock magic and not just fire...) and was greeted by a frost dragon circling above. It came down to land, so I gave it some fire to cool it down, along with a few timely sword wounds. It took off again and as I was waiting for it to come back, it got distracted by two bears so was hovering over them and breathing frost on them. It then landed next to them. I sprinted over and all 3 of us (it would have been 4 had Faendal bothered to get his arse into gear) fought this dragon. Made things much simpler for me. Shock and Fire spells combined and it was dead in no time. However, the bears then decided to rip my head off. Pleasant. I reloaded, but it must have taken me about 4 or 5 attempts to beat the Dragon and the bears. I even used my Nord shout command to scare them off for 30 seconds, but they just ran towards Faendal and attacked him instead. So I had to then run over and help him. Back to square 1.

Took a while, anyway.

 

[Scutch]

There are some bits that make me LOL in this game.

I went into a pub, some bloke turns around and says "what are you looking at?" So I gave it the macho and tried intimidating him, which didn't work and got into a fight with him, him wearing some old robes and no shoes, with me looking like this:

So I beat him to a pulp, he gets up and says, "You've been a good friend to me, that means something". Really, I have just beaten the s**t out of you. Next time I saw him was at my wedding! Lol

Is that Dwarven armour?

 

[Cookie]

Is that Dwarven armour?

Yep

 

[Scutch]

Cool. I recognised the shield. Found that in a chest in a cavern where those Spiggans had killed that chap's 2 mates.

I did have the armour too but lost it when storing it. I'm currently rocking 50 rated Steel armour, but it's weight is 38 which I think is a tad high.

I've also got a magic hood on which gives me f*ck all protection to the noggin, but increases my magicka by 30 points

I think these are my current stats : 220/220 Magicka (with hood) 220/220 Health 210/210 Stamina.

 

[Craigus]

If you go into a Dwarven/Falmer cave, beware of a f**k off big robot thing. Scared the s**t outta me the first time, and was tough as a mother.

 

[Wilkeh]

I really need to stash my stuff somewhere, can I drop all the items in my room at the magic college and it still be there when I go back?

 

[Darren S]

Archers skill shot...

I lol'd

FPMSL! Quality that!

D.

 

[Darren S]

I really need to stash my stuff somewhere, can I drop all the items in my room at the magic college and it still be there when I go back?

I do wish Bethesda were a little sensible with the inventory. Like Fallout and Oblivion before it, just one character can end up carrying half-an-army's worth of kit. Looks a bit silly when you select 'All' on the inventory screen and you can scroll downwards for ages.

Would be better to have a main weapon and secondary one, imo - and a few items in a backpack. Pretty much like you see when you go into third-person on your character. Although not a first-person RPG, Titan Quest did a brilliant job in transporting kit imo - by letting you use caravans to store items.

D.

 

[Scutch]

You can store your items anyway and it should still be there when you return.

I've got stuff in barrels at Riverwood. LOL.

But I'd definitely suggest buying a house as once it's stored there, it's there for good.

 

[DEMONKNIGHT666]

You can store your items anyway and it should still be there when you return.

I've got stuff in barrels at Riverwood. LOL.

But I'd definitely suggest buying a house as once it's stored there, it's there for good.

While this is true to some extent, I have "left" stuff and it's been knicked, so beware.

 

[STRBramley]

Little tip. If you type 'tm' into the console it will disable your HUD so you can get better screenshots.

 

[Rob]

Question, how are some of you guys so rich? I need to buy a house.

Second question, wtf is the purpose of dragon scales and bones for mages?

Other than being STUPIDLY heavy and weighing me down big time?

 

[Sargara]

Found a mod on skyrimnexus yesturday that lets you kill children. FINALLY! It deffinately gets my seal of approval
http://www.skyrimnexus.com/downloads/file.php?id=774

 

[STRBramley]

Question, how are some of you guys so rich? I need to buy a house.

Second question, wtf is the purpose of dragon scales and bones for mages?

Other than being STUPIDLY heavy and weighing me down big time?

I'd like to know this too. I just sell them asap.

As for money. I just loot every penny I find and sell everything I don't want.

 

[no-name-person]

You can use dragon bits to craft dragon armour later on

 

[Scutch]

Yeah but if you're a mage you won't need the armour, therefore sell it. However, crafting dragon armour will net you healthy rewards, gold wise. But then being a mage you won't have 100 smithing, so just sell them when you collect them.

As for buying a house, I must admit that I did use the exploit to get the house in Whiterun for free

F*ck paying 5k gold for it.